Today I want to talk about Love. A strange yet familiar virus that we all at some point in our lives have or will be infected with.
(I bet you were not expecting that lovey dovy beginning)
Love the Virus
Love is a beautiful, weird, complicated thing with a very busy schedule. It’s worse than a cold in that it’s ability to infect its host has nothing to do with temperature or environment. It infects all people and depending on the individual can lead you down a lovely or crazy path.
Yesterday, I celebrated two years of marriage, thus my thoughts towards the virus responsible for my union. I ponder on my infection which struck me in 2011 and journey around the moments that have made my wife and I the couple we are today.
Love though a virus can mutate to a deadly cancer. Those in it can attest to this feature.
(I was not the brightest biology or chemistry student so please bear with me)
Love Stages
Just like cancer, there are stages to love. I strongly believe I am a stage 4 love patient.
S tage 1 is what I call the “Checking You Out“stage aka CYO. This is when you are interested or attracted in someone yet no move has been made to declare intention.
Stage 2 is the “Going Out” stage. This if successful is a long era of a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. It usually starts with a honey moon period that is usually very rosy and fairy tale themed but gradually comes back to reality.
Stage 3 is Marriage. This is where commitment between the couple is taken up a notch and publicized for the whole world to know. You are now stuck to another human till death.
Stage 4 is Reality. This is where the question of love being a good virus or bad virus sets in. For some guys it begins to feel similar to a restaurant outing with friends where everyone orders; when the orders arrive, you start wondering why you didn’t order what your friend had.
For the ladies, the reality of snoring, cleaning up after the guy, his obsession with sports and other male behaviours come into play filli filli (Ghanaian slang for very clear)
So is marriage worth it?
It sure is. I now look like someone feeds me. Before I got married, my bachelor lifestyle and inability to cook nothing but an egg, fried yam and rice left me as some lenge lenge (Ghanaian slang for skinny) model on an America’s Next Top Model series.
My dear wife makes it a point to ensure that I am fed daily and it’s a trait of her’s that I often take for granted. Her mother really trained her well.
I have been blessed with a beautiful son, which in my books is the next best gift from God after Salvation and my wife. He is so cute and adorable and has brought a sense of happiness into my life that I never knew.
Haters will say I could have gotten the baby without being married. I agree, but that process causes complications and I would not get to see him everyday and also immediately when he wakes up, that’s when his excitement peaks and eagerly wants to play.
I am going to skip the obvious benefits like sex, companionship and stuff and just say that my wife is not perfect, but neither am I. I prefer it that way though; for the things I am unable to do, she is able to do and vice versa.
She is a great mother who worries a lot but I won’t have it any other way. She supports me and my art, even though she is not a Hip Hop head and doesn’t know the time that Usher rolled up in drop top cruising the streets.
(I don’t expect the young ones to comprehend but don’t feel bad. My wife doesn’t know either)
I guess that’s why I love her. She makes me laugh and for the most part sees eye to eye on important stuff.
(Trust me there are some issues we don’t see eye to eye on)
Two Years of Marriage
Two years of marriage is a blessing from the Lord. Chale, some do not even make it past two months. This however is not a competition but a journey. My wife is my life companion and mother of my son. She prays for me, feeds me and supports me amongst other things.
(It won’t be bad though for God to add a dance move or two to her repertoire ?)
As I reflect on how far this love virus has brought me, I realize that given other choices I will still stick with my darling wife. She is not perfect but I doubt anyone on earth can match her uniqueness.
She was crafted ewe-tologically to suit the Nzema in me. Unfortunately the Nzema in me doesn’t like Banku, which is the dish she prides herself in cooking.
Conclusion
So on our second anniversary, I raise my glass to you darling and thank God for your life and the wonderful work you are doing in mine. You are a beauty not only in appearance but in grace and duty. A true Queen and African Empress. I celebrate you and our union and pray for many more to come. May this love virus that connects us continue to make us love sick over each other.
Happy Anniversary darling! Continue being Hondred Percent!